Well, I find the work of Sartre particularily stimulating in this time of low self esteem. Striving to do my best in this world may not have the desired effect that I wish it to have, but I know that those around me will appreciate the effort. I know I'm responsible for the actions of those around me in some small way and in recent days I have sucumbed to sin and vice. I doubt this has a kharmic response in the scheme of things, I don't believe that jazz, but I do feel that by submitting to these causes I've helped to degrade this world a bit more.

Kevin, Dennis, Alex - I owe you my apologies for recent mood swings and my temper flaring. I don't take criticism well, even if it is earned. Taking it from teachers in the form of grades, from friends, from parents, and from employeers on an hourly basis is debasing me rapidly and I never seem to have time to release. As Kevin put it, I fucked up my life, but I think that if the three of you want to adopt the position that you won't be my parents, than please refrain from the rest of the criticism that I expect to hear when I call home.

I see you as friends, and the only friends I have lately. But I've never felt so detached and further from Sartre's existential world than I do today.



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